Proverbs 29.5
“A man who flatters his neighbor spreads a net for his feet.”
Proverbs speaks consistently against flattery, because it hypes and does not help; it harms. The harm communicated is the image of a net that is secretly spread out. And just as a snare is deployed and camouflaged from the prey, so flattery sets up people for entrapment.
Flattery is “the kiss of an enemy.” It feels good in the moment, but it’s nefarious purpose is hidden behind the kiss. Flattery is false praise; it is deceitful. Manipulators use flattery and false praise to create a pseudo sense of confidence in order to take advantage of naive people. They use flattery to cheat and defraud. To deceive, dupe, and exploit.
Earlier in Proverbs chapter 5, Solomon warned us extensively to avoid the seductress … the forbidden woman. In other words, stay away from anyone or anything that would seek to seduce you through false praise and attractive lies.
“For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.” (Proverbs 5.3-4)
The forbidden woman — the seductress — speaks with sweetness, but what she actually brings is poison, and she will destroy you. Flattery works precisely this way. It is appealing, attractive, and makes you feel good, but in the end it distorts and destroys.
In chapter 22, Solomon warns again about the deceitful flattery of the forbidden woman: “The mouth of forbidden women is a deep pit; he with whom the Lord is angry will fall into it.”
As you navigate the world, you must be careful. Very careful. The world will tell you what you want to hear. It will use attractive lies to deceive and seduce you. This is the nature of false religion, idolatry, materialism, greed, and certain political philosophies. They seduce you into embracing them, and then lead you astray. The attractive lies of the world are pleasurable in the beginning, but eventually they kill you.
Don’t be foolish. Don’t be led astray by the lust and lies of the forbidden woman, no matter what form she takes. Be very careful; it will be a form that you will find attractive. Listen to the voice of truth, turn away from the seductions of those who use flattery and kisses to deceive you, and learn to live in alignment with God’s standards.