Proverbs 27:10
“Do not forsake your friend and your father’s friend, and do not go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity. Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother who is far away.”
As important as family is, there are times when a close friendship is even more powerful. A small group of committed, intimate friends can be more important than the natural relationship of family.
This was also the message in Proverbs 18.24: “There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”
When trouble comes, and it will come, you want a real friend to stand with you, one that loves at all times and considers your problems to be their own. You want a friend who will stand with you no matter the cost or difficulty. A cultivated friendship based on character, conviction, truth, and wisdom will far surpass the expected help of a natural brother that is only connected to you by blood and name.
Adversity is a crucible that tests us and refines a relationship. The time of need is the test of friendship. We saw this when we studied Proverbs 17.17: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”
It’s one thing to have companions and buddies, it’s another thing to have true friends. A real friend is someone who loves and serves and supports during the toughest circumstances of life.
What is most attention-getting about what Proverbs teaches regarding relationships is that you can have many companions but nevertheless “come to ruin.” That is because a companion is not the same as a true friend. Solomon tells what us makes a true friend different from a mere companion: a true friend “sticks closer than a brother.” When disaster strikes, a “companion” is likely to abandon you. Not so a friend.
Deep friendships don’t just happen. They are built over time, and they are the result of hard work. Most importantly, they are built in the midst of challenging and difficult situations. You don’t really know the strength of a relationship until it has been tested in the crucible of adversity.
