Proverbs 22.6
“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
The process of learning (musar) is itself something that needs to be learned. Building skill is a skill that must be developed. We need to help children learn to learn. Teaching children to embrace the process of musar requires helping them make three commitments: Choose the mindset. Do the work. Be coachable.
- Choose the Mindset
It is often said that successful people are “gifted,” but that is very misleading. The deciding factor in building skill isn’t talent; it is the mindset and motivation to do the work to get better. It is committing to the process of musar. The reality is that talent is a gift. Mindset is a choice. Anyone can build effective skill if they are motivated and energized by a “get better” mindset.
This is why scripture repeatedly emphasizes “renewing the mind.” Mindset — that is, mental state — is the initial driver and motivator of learning and growth. Musar is a mindset.
Here is the mindset of people who are committed to growing and getting better:
- Growing and building skill takes time and effort. I will invest the time and be tenaciously persistent.
- I understand that discomfort is part of the process. If I try to avoid discomfort, I will prevent learning.
- I will make mistakes, and they will teach me. The process of learning is about progress, not perfection.
- I want feedback and coaching. I want instruction and correction.
This get better mindset — the musar mindset — isn’t natural or easy. It needs to be modeled for children, and it needs to be taught to children. The old nature rejects growing and getting better. It does not want to learn. It does not want instruction or correction.
Proverbs talks about the foolishness of a mindset that resists learning and growth:
“Fools despise wisdom and instruction.” (Proverbs 1.7)
“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.” (Proverbs 12.1)
“He who neglects discipline despises himself, but he who listens to reproof acquires understanding.” (Proverbs 15.32)
To ignore or dismiss musar is foolishness of the highest order, and the consequences can be devastating. Again, parents must model a growth mindset for their children and teach a growth mindset for their children. It is the responsibility of parents to help their children learn to learn.
The Christian community needs to embrace the mindset of “Doesn’t matter, get better.” We need to fully embrace musar. It is time for the people of God to wake up and recognize that being saved is not the same as being trained. We have been terribly negligent in skill-building. We have misunderstood the nature of grace and have often operated under the misguided notion that the Lord will somehow magically give us wisdom and maturity.
We are called to respond to God in faith and do the work required for spiritual growth and skill-building. This is the very meaning and purpose of musar. In response to God’s grace in our life, we must walk in the Spirit, exercise self-discipline, and learn wisdom. “For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age.” (Titus 2:11-12)
The mature Christian life is not given; it is learned. It is developed through discipline. We are not supernaturally infused with spiritual maturity when we are saved. Rather, spiritual growth and maturity is a discipline-driven process that requires our full effort. At the same time, the process is energized and empowered by the Spirit of God. Like any process, it takes time.
Further, it is a grave mistake to relegate this training only to so-called “spiritual” things. The wisdom of God teaches and instructs us to be disciplined and skillful in our work. Christians trained by musar will be very good at executing their job-related tasks and responsibilities, whether in the field, forest, factory, fellowship, or family. They will work hard to learn the knowledge and skills necessary for doing their job with excellence.
People in the grip of grace are not satisfied with mediocrity. They strive for excellence in their job … not because of arrogance or pride, but because they understand they are agents of the Kingdom of God.
Trust God and do the work. Doesn’t matter, get better.
