Proverbs 17.27-18
“Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.”
Words are very powerful things, much more powerful than many of us realize. God calls us to choose our words wisely. If you want a productive and effective life, it is necessary to be disciplined in your speech and use what you say for the benefit and encouragement of others. Scripture provides many instructions on how to be disciplined and effective in your speech, and it offers many admonitions that warn not to speak foolishly.
Being careful and wise about your words includes your conversational speech, as well as your online messages. This includes texts, emails, tweets, IG and Facetime posts, and comments in online forums. I am greatly disheartened by much of what is being posted online. Actually, disheartened isn’t strong enough. Mortified is more accurate.
At the end of Proverbs chapter 17 and in multiple verses in chapter 18, Solomon gives timeless advice about being disciplined in what we say, how we say it, and why.
- Proverbs 17.27-28: “Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.” Exercise verbal restraint. Don’t say more than is necessary. Exercise emotional restraint. Control your spirit; keep your spirit “cool.” Do not let mismanaged emotions speak for you. Speak with wisdom or be silent. To put it more bluntly, either speak wisely or don’t say anything.
- Proverbs 18.2,13, 17: “A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion … If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame … The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.”
Listen attentively and speak cautiously. Seek first to understand. Don’t offer an opinion unless you have done your homework. It is foolish to give an opinion about things you do not understand. If you speak hastily, you will embarrass yourself. Be careful about speaking too soon and without considering a broader perspective.
- Proverbs 18.4: “The words of a man’s mouth are deep waters; the fountain of wisdom is a bubbling brook.”
The words of a wise person “bubble up” from a place of deep thought and insight. The image of a brook indicates that the words of the wise are life-giving to others. Their observations are careful, thoughtful, and helpful.
Proverbs 18.6-8: “A fool’s lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating. A fool’s mouth is his ruin, and his lips are a snare to his soul. The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body.”
Don’t be impulsive with your words. Don’t gossip! Don’t be argumentative! Don’t be combative! If you speak recklessly, you are inviting conflict. Use gentle words when someone is angry. Talk to people, not about people. When you gossip, it’s like eating food that tastes good, but then makes you very sick. Heed the dire warning in this passage: Be careful that your mouth doesn’t ruin you; that it doesn’t ensnare and entrap your very soul with words of arrogance and deceitfulness.
- Proverbs 18.20: “From the fruit of a man’s mouth his stomach is satisfied; he is satisfied by the yield of his lips.”
Speaking with truth and wisdom is spiritually fulfilling. Just as food satisfies physical hunger, so also words of wisdom satisfy the soul and the spirit. - Proverbs 18.21: “Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.”
Again, words are very powerful things, much more powerful than many of us realize. God calls us to choose our words wisely. If you want a productive and effective life, it is necessary to learn how to be disciplined in your speech and use what you say for the benefit and encouragement of others. Use your words to give life to others.
When we honor Christ as Lord, our talk is real and authentic, and it is appropriate for the situation. In some situations we should speak quietly and gently; in other situations directly and dispassionately; in still other situations we should speak with an emotional edge. It all depends on the circumstance, and therefore wisdom is involved. What the Lord wants is for us to use the right words at the right time in the right way for the right reason. He does not want us speaking out of impulse or mismanaged emotion.
Here are three practical steps for being careful and wise with your words.
- Be careful and wise about what you say. This is the content of your words. Is it true and relevant? Is it accurate? Based on what credible source? Is it simply your opinion? Is it hearsay and gossip?
- Be careful and wise about why you speak. Examine your motives. Why are you speaking, writing, or posting? Are you just spreading gossip? If you are expressing a critical opinion, why? For what purpose? Are you seeking to help or to hurt?
- Be careful and wise about how you speak. Examine your method of speaking, writing, or posting. are you using harsh and abrasive language just to be disparaging and demeaning? O are you sending messages in an effective, compelling, beneficial way?
Trust God and do the work.
