Proverbs 10.11-14
“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses. On the lips of him who has understanding, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks sense. The wise lay up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool brings ruin near.”
Solomon continues with the theme of “the mouth of the righteous” versus “the mouth of the fool.” In particular he is emphasizing how the condition of our heart determines the way we speak and communicate. Or to put it another way, how our mindset drives what we say, how we say it, and why we say it.
People who operate from a heart of hatred and wickedness will often use their words and rhetoric to conceal the violence they intend, because they are hoping you will not notice their true motives until it is too late.
At some point, however, it catches up with them. First they experience punishment (“a rod for the back”), which may simply be the negative outcomes that result from their foolish comments. Ultimately, however, the negative things that a fool says will bring disaster. By continuing to speak recklessly, a fool is inviting problems that eventually bring ruin.
The mouth of the righteous, on the other hand, listens and learns. It seeks to understand. The wise person does the work to “lay up knowledge” before they speak. As a result, the mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life.
Do not skip too quickly over the phrase “lay up knowledge.” This is a reference to thinking first, speaking second. All of us need to be better at this. The natural tendency is to be impetuous and impulsive. We tend to jump to conclusions based on how we feel, and we tend to speak too soon and with too much confidence.
We are far too heavily influenced by how we feel. We are not very disciplined about distinguishing facts from story. The bottom line: Don’t believe everything you think. Your first reaction is rarely your best.
In other words, gain hokma so that you can speak with understanding and insight. And in order to gain hokma, you must commit to the disciplined process of musar … which is the hard work of doing your homework before you speak.
What a great question to ask yourself when you are in a conversation, and especially if you are in a debate or argument: Have I done my homework? Am I speaking from understanding, or merely from opinion?
And this might be the central point of the entire passage: “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.” In the midst of focusing on how we use our words, Solomon reminds us that love matters. If someone is motivated by hatred, they will use their words to tear down and destroy. People who speak from hate don’t help anything; in fact, they hurt everything.
Those motivated by love use their words to build up and heal. Don’t make the mistake of thinking love is soft. It’s not. Love doesn’t make excuses, because it speaks truth even when it hurts. It is love that motivates us to say what needs to be said in order to promote what is good and necessary.
Do the work to make sure you understand before you speak.
